Scissoring Sex Toy: How to Choose On & Use It Well

If you and your partner are curious about adding a toy designed specifically for scissoring or tribbing, you’re in a sweet spot. Unlike many mass-market sex toys, these are created to enhance mutual body-to-body contact and shared pleasure in positions where vulvas or genitals rub together. This article will walk you through what a scissoring sex toy is, how it fits into intimate play, what features to look for, how to use it safely and comfortably, and how to integrate it into your erotic life in a way that feels natural and fun.

We’ll also include an internal link to a related article about actor Marisa Abela and on-screen intimacy — because real connection and intention matter in both scenes and your own bedroom. Internal link: Marisa Abela sex scenes.
And we’ll include one external link to a trusted source.

What Is a Scissoring Sex Toy?

“Scissoring” (also called tribbing) is a form of sexual activity where two partners’ genitals make contact—often vulva-to-vulva—or one partner’s genitals rub against another’s body surface. It’s often thought of in lesbian or queer women’s play, but anyone with vulvas or seeking pelvic-to-pelvic contact may explore it. Them+2Wikipedia+2

A scissoring sex toy is specifically designed to enhance this kind of contact by providing dual stimulation zones, ergonomic shapes that sit between or across partners, and features that allow both partners to feel the toy. For example:

The “Shi/Shi Union” toy was created for lesbian couples specifically for scissoring — it has two vibrating halves and a ridge designed to align across vulvas. AfterEllen
The “RockHer” by Wet For Her is marketed as a vibrator for scissoring or frottage, designed for leg-cross or body rub angles. The Sensation Shop+1

In short: These toys aren’t just “another vibrator” — they are built for mutual contact, shared positioning, and two-person alignment.

Why Use a Scissoring Sex Toy?

Here are some of the key benefits that make this toy category both distinct and appealing:

Enhanced shared sensation: Because both partners may feel vibration or pressure at the same time, the experience becomes more mutual — not just one person’s stimulation.
Support for scissoring positions: Some traditional scissoring positions can feel awkward or tiring — a toy can assist by filling gaps, offering surface texture, or reducing friction-hotspots.
Versatility: While designed for scissoring/frottage, you can also use such toys for solo play or as an add-on in other positions.
An invitation to explore: Using a toy made for this kind of contact encourages couples to try new angles, trust, and communication — which is healthy in any intimacy.
Representation & inclusion: For couples who identify as lesbian, bi, queer or simply enjoy pelvic-to-pelvic contact, it signals that your needs are valid and catered for. Many sex-toy brands are only recently acknowledging this. Her Campus

What to Look for When Choosing a Scissoring Sex Toy

Because this is a niche category, it pays to shop thoughtfully. Here are the criteria to check:

1. Dual contact surfaces

Ensure the toy is designed so both partners get stimulation. Some have two vibration motors, symmetrical surfaces, or split-contact design.

2. Flexible or ergonomic shape

Since you’ll likely be angled, rubbing, or leaning into each other, the toy should adapt to body shapes. Curves, ridges, pivot points matter (see the Shi/Shi ridge example above).

3. Material & texture

Look for body-safe silicone, non-porous surfaces, comfortable ridges or flats depending on preference. Soft ridges help grip or align the toy between partners.

4. Control & settings

If one partner wants more intensity and the other less, independent controls (or remote) are a plus. RockHer, for example, offers 10 vibration functions. The Sensation Shop

5. Compatibility with lubricant

Because contact zones may rub, ensure you use a compatible lubricant. Silicone-to-silicone toys may need water-based lubes.

6. Size & body-fit

Too bulky and it might ruin the comfortable scissoring angle. A comfortable width and length helps—allowing you to maintain close thighs and leg-cross posture without strain.

7. Ease of cleaning & storage

Because scissoring involves skin-to-skin and toy surfaces, ensure you can clean it easily, store it discretely, and maintain hygiene.

How to Use a Scissoring Sex Toy — Step-by-Step

Here’s a friendly walkthrough on how to introduce this toy into your play, especially if it’s your first time.

Step 1: Communicate & plan

Sit down together and talk about it:

What angles do you like with scissoring or body contact?
Are there positions you’ve tried before or want to try?
How do you each feel about vibration intensity?
Agree on cues: “Let’s stop if it hurts or if we want slower movement.”

Step 2: Warm up & set the mood

Start with a sensual massage, or apply body oil for sensual touch (you might want to check our linked article on body oil for mood here). This warms your bodies, relaxes hips and thighs, and prepares you for close contact.

Step 3: Choose your position

Sit facing each other and cross legs (classic “scissor”), lay side-by-side with thighs pressed, or one partner sit while the other straddles.
Tip: Initially go for an angle that feels easy, then adjust as you get comfortable.

Step 4: Introduce the toy

Place the scissoring toy between you as designed. Read instructions: some are meant to sit on top of vulvas, others between thighs, others with internal portions.
Start vibration low. Explore how your bodies move together—rocking hips, shifting legs, adjusting pressure.

Step 5: Movement & rhythm

Try slow rocking, gently pressing your thighs, leaning into each other.
Experiment: slow roll, gentle side-to-side, thrust-style rubs.
Pay attention to comfort: adjust leg positions, support hips with pillows if needed.

Step 6: Feedback & adjustments

Ask each other:

“Do you feel this angle better if we shift a bit?”
“Is the toy too strong / too light for you?”
“Would you like a little more hip motion or slower roll?”

Step 7: Aftercare

Once you finish or switch off the toy:

Turn off vibration, remove toy, rinse off, and spend 2-5 minutes cuddling.
Talk about what you liked: “I felt really connected when we rotated hips that way.”
Note what you’d adjust next time.

Position Variations & Toy Angle Tips

Here are some creative twists to try once you’re comfortable:

Classic legs-cross: Sit facing each other, cross one partner’s thigh over the other’s opposite thigh. Place toy on the crossing area.
Side by side, facing same direction: Both partners lie on their side, bodies close, pressing thighs together. The toy sits between the two bodies.
One partner reclined, other straddling: Partner A reclines slightly, thighs open; Partner B straddles and leans forward. Place toy between B’s inner thighs and A’s front.
Lap sit variation: One sits on seat, legs apart; other sits on their lap facing outward, toy between thighs, enabling mutual contact.
Standing/lean variation: If you have strong leg support, one partner stands slightly bent, other partner stands facing them closely. Use toy between thighs or front contact. (Make sure balance is secure.)

Safety & Comfort Considerations

Because scissoring and shared contact can generate heat or friction, here are key precautions:

Use lubrication: Water-based lube helps friction zones, avoid silicone only if toy is silicone.
Leg/hip comfort: If you feel numbness, switch positions or insert pillow under knees.
Toy hygiene: Clean before and after, especially if multiple users.
Check for STI risk: Skin-to-skin contact still carries risk—use dental dams or barriers if preferred. Women’s Health+1
Temperature & comfort: If thighs or groin become too hot, pause.
Go slow and listen: The first uses may feel awkward – allow space to adjust.
Storage & material: Store toy in clean pouch, separate if silicone-to-skin direct contact.

Myths & Misconceptions About Scissoring Sex Toys

Let’s clear up some common misunderstandings.

Myth: Scissoring is only for lesbians.
Reality: Anyone with vulvas or who enjoys contact can explore it. The key is body-to-body alignment and openness. Them+1
Myth: Without penetration it’s not “real sex.”
Reality: Shared contact and mutual stimulation are valid forms of sexual intimacy.
Myth: Toys for scissoring are gimmicks.
Reality: They exist because standard toys often don’t cater to pelvic-to-pelvic alignment. As one article noted: “There is a lesbian sex toy made especially for scissoring and we’re excited.” AfterEllen
Myth: It’s easy and instant.
Reality: It often requires experimentation with angle, leg position, toy placement and lubrication. Comfort isn’t automatic. Women’s Health

Integrating a Scissoring Toy into Your Intimacy Routine

Here’s how to make this tool part of your intimate life (not just one-time novelty):

Start without it – Try your favourite scissoring position for 5-10 minutes just with body contact.
Introduce the toy – Use it for one session when you’re both relaxed and curious.
Make it part of foreplay – Use the toy during warm-up, then transition into other positions or stimulation.
Communicate and reflect – After each time, talk about what you liked and what you might change.
Rotate usage – Don’t feel you must use the toy every time; incorporate it when it adds value.
Store it lovingly – Storing it with care adds to the ritual and pleasure of taking it out again.

When a Scissoring Toy Might Not Be Ideal

There are times when using this kind of toy may not be the best idea right away:

If either partner has recent surgery, hip/knee issues or leg circulation problems.
If one or both partners are very tired or sore — it requires some leg/hip strength.
If the leg/hip alignment in your space is awkward or if one partner is much taller/shorter and the contact feels strained.
If you lack time to experiment – this toy rewards patience and comfort, not rush.

Final Thoughts

A scissoring sex toy opens a beautiful space of shared contact, mutual pleasure and exploration beyond standard moves. When chosen wisely, used thoughtfully, and respected for what it does, it can make connection between partners richer, more aligned, and more intimate.

What matters most isn’t the toy itself but the communication, comfort and presence you bring to that moment. Like on-screen intimacy with actors such as Marisa Abela, trust and intention amplify sensation. Your toy is a tool—but you and your partner are the creators of the experience.

So lean in, align together, explore angles, rub, vibrate, shift, laugh, pause, and delight in discovering what works for you. The most pleasurable sex isn’t always in the perfect position—it’s in the shared one.

FAQ

Q1: What exactly is a scissoring sex toy?
It’s a toy designed for shared genital-to-genital or pelvis-to-pelvis contact (often called scissoring or tribbing), with dual surfaces or shape that fits between partners for mutual stimulation.

Q2: Can any couple use a scissoring sex toy?
Yes—any couple comfortable exploring contact, alignment and sharing stimulation can use one. It’s not limited to one orientation or identity.

Q3: Do you still need lubricant with these toys?
Yes. Lubrication often improves comfort, reduces friction and enhances movement—especially since scissoring uses more body contact.

Q4: How do I pick the right one?
Look for dual surfaces, flexible shape, body-safe materials, independent vibration controls, good fit for your bodies and easy cleaning.

Q5: Is it safe in terms of STI risk?
While scissoring is outercourse, genital-to-genital contact still carries some risk of STI transmission. Use barrier methods (like dental dams), clean toys, discuss STI status with your partner. Women’s Health+1

Q6: How do we integrate it into our sex life without it being awkward?
Start slowly. Use it in a relaxed setting. Communicate openly. Make it part of foreplay, not a performance. Reflect after the experience and adjust next time.

Scissoring Sex Toy: How to Choose One, Use It Well & Spice Up Couples Play

What Is a Scissoring Sex Toy?

Why Use a Scissoring Sex Toy?